The gold trimmed stained oak doors opened before me like the sea parting before Moses. I strode forward, my internal music spurring me forth. I always have Applause by Lady Gaga playing on repeat in my mind, it keeps me focused. It reminds me who I am.

To my left Jean from accounting, she got a wink for the cleavage peeking out to me beneath two undone buttons. To my right Alex went for a high five, I faked him out with a laugh and kept it rolling.

My secretary, Miss Lucy Windle, fell into step beside me "Mr. Right, you really have to sign these papers I ha-"

"Not now Lucy, I have clients to see. I have lives to change! Tell me, who gets to experience the magic first"

"You have Mr. and Mrs. Bates for eleven o'clock Mr. Right"

I snuck a quick pinch of Penny's luscious behind and spun away while simultaneously high fiving three more of my employees. As we neared the doors to my office, I skidded to a stop on the polished floors, turned to my staff and raised my hands before announcing

"IT'S TIIIIIIIIME FOR SOME MAAAAAAAAAGIIIIIIIIIIIC!"

 Jennifer and Gil Bates were my greatest success story. They'd been seeing me nearly two years about their little business. IT or computers or something, I forget which. In any case, since first coming to see me I hear their company is worth billions, and has a pretty big stake in the market. Of course, none of that really matters. The only thing that matters...

"Is taking that risk! I'm telling you Gil, I'm telling you, you gotta take that risk! Never let an opportunity pass you by! Doesn't matter how big or how small, doesn't matter how foolish other people say it is! You gotta do it man! You just gotta do it!"

Gil and Jennifer usually don't say a whole lot, awe can do that to some people. But I take it in my stride, they're here to listen after all. People come to me to hear what I have to say. I get paid millions for my wisdom.

"So, when I tell you that you shouldn't worry about that A-phone or L-phone or whatever it is ol Jean Sobs is trying to change the world with now... you can believe me Gil. You've been coming to me for a long time right Gil? Of course you have, because you know I'm the best at what I do! Why, if I didn't think it'd be stealing all your thunder I'd come and nick the market right out from under you!"

We all had a laugh at that. I'd never do that to my loyal customers. No. My friends.

The session continued for a full hour before I had to send them away. I'm a busy man after all.

"Lucy!"

"It's Linda, Mr. Right, sir"

"Who's my 2 o'clock Lucy?"

She shuffled some papers. It seemed Miss Windle was always carrying that stack with her. I made a mental note to discuss this with her. Perhaps it was time Miss Windle got her own dose of Thomas Right's Magic, so she could better get her life on track. Last thing I needed was to be bogged down with an incompetent secretary.

"A mister, uh, Ronald Victor, sir"

"Ronald Victor? Is he that hotshot new politician running for the presidency?"

"I believe so Mr. Right"

I beamed. Of course he was coming to me! Nobody could make it to the Oval Office without my sterling wisdom.

"Well, go ahead and send him in!"

The door opened and a man walked in. I could see right away this was a man of quality. He had a gaggle of nobodies gathered around him, which he dismissed with a wave. I invited him to come sit and we shook hands.

"Ron? Ron Victor?" I asked

"That's me" he shook my hand and sat "so... I need advice. I need the best advice. I'm gunna win this whole thing. It's gunna be great"

Right into it? That's my kind of guy!

"Listen Ronald- can I call you Ron?"

He nodded in approval "people sometimes call me 'the Ron'"

"Ron" I said "listen. You gotta listen to me. Everything you've done up till now? Forget it! Everything people tell you? Don't listen to them! You gotta reach down, you gotta reach down and take life by the pussy! You gotta grip it hard and make things great!"

Ron's face lit up.